Friday, March 28, 2008

Zapping the energy sappers

Four months before I went back to work, I went on a life coaching course. A bunch of 4 mothers (children ranging from 8 months to 16 years) would get together and be challenged to think in new, healthier ways about our lives.

One big lesson I remembered was to deal with the tasks left undone. It's easy to 'remember' the lesson; it's something else to really 'learn' it.

Those chores and awkward jobs can just drain my energy. The danger is that my self esteem could be depleted if I start telling myself things like:
  • I'm just no good at this kind of thing.
  • I'm no good at getting organised.
  • I'm just not good enough.
As you can tell this would be an unhelpful thought pattern to fall into. I'm interested to hear what strategies you have for dealing with these thoughts if and when they occur. 

My preference would be to do two things:
  • Take 5 minutes a day to sit and meditate. (Five minutes for a mum is difficult enough so I don't set silly expectations of 20 minute meditations). Be alone, be quiet. Clear my mind. Find some personal space in my head. If a thought comes into my head, I'd visualise pushing it away as if it's a fluffy white cloud. By the way, this isn't about prayer - I do that as well, but I don't confuse it with meditation. 
  • Write down self affirmations about being a compassionate loving person, not worrying what others think and believing in my goals. I would say these to myself every day (there is a view that these should be spoken to a mirror every day, but that makes me feel weird).
And after that... well, there's plenty after that. 

In the meantime, I'm spotting the early signs that I've got some unfinished tasks to deal with. I don't want them to build into anything bigger and more energy-sapping. So here's what I'm going to tackle in the next fortnight:
  • Arrange a babysitter for a fun night out next Saturday
  • Book a haircut and rely on Ricarro to look after Ellie (it's been six months).
  • Update the family budget and discuss it with Ricarro.
  • Arrange dates for seeing my folks.
  • Get running, sit-upping, press-upping etc again. It's been too cold and windy for running lately but now I'm on a three month countdown to my next bikini moment.
Did you see that I don't have my tax return on that list. I'm so proud of myself for getting that done on time this year. 

That's another life coaching lesson - reward yourself for the good stuff, pats self on back ;).


Beth said...

As a coach myself, I have to say fantastic! And I love the mediation exercise - I always try to get clients to give themselves 5 minutes to centre themselves and clear their minds.

And thanks for the tag on my children or not blog! I probably won't do it on that blog as I'm pretty identifiable. But I might resurrect a mum blog that has lay fallow for about 4 months - Scruffy Mummy! I miss blogging about mum stuff but I do need to do my 'professional book blog' first now!

SaraLynn said...

This is good stuff! I will have to give t a try. I worry about all the things I don't get accomplished, as well. Do all women do that? Is it built into our pschye?
Anyway, Thanks for the tips. And I am going to have to make myself a list of good things to do.

SaraLynn said...

p.s. love your MEEZ character, cute!

Sass E-mum said...

Meez characters have a way of making us all look kinda sassy. Oddly I forgot my glasses first time around. Well... I was living in fantasy land.